Truth is, there is no such thing as a personal problem if you have a problem, chances are there are millions of people who are having the same problem, have had it, or will have it in the future.This does not minimize the problem or mean that you are not legitimately a victim of that problem. It simply means that you are not special.Often, it's the realization that you and your problems are not actually unique in their severity or pain that is the first and foremost step of solving it. ﻿

You are not special.

Suffering is inevitable in life. But sometimes, as much as we dread the idea of suffering, suffering is not always associated with something negative, and in fact, it can be enjoyable, that's if it's in our control and directed toward some greater purpose.Now that we know that suffering is inevitable and our problems are unavoidable, then the question we should be asking is not "How do I stop suffering?" but "Why am I suffering, for what purpose?" Once we determine this and change our mindset toward it. Suffering takes on a new dimension and becomes more endurable.

The value of suffering. 

Many of us have the belief that our happiness will come when we achieve certain things. We think: when I have that car A or get married to that girl B or graduate from college with that GPA of C, then I'll be truly happy.The truth is there is no real value that comes from acquiring all these things apart from the ones that we give them.If eventually, you do acquire, A, B, or C. There will be new problems that stem from those things that you have acquired, only that you may have problems that will be better than what existed before.

Step 2: Happiness is a problem. 

<ul><li>Understanding the whole damn concept: Not giving a fuck does not mean being indifferent. Rather, it is the art of wisely choosing the fucks that we do decide to give.</li><li>Hence, the sad truth: You see, you are going to die soon. And probably everyone you know and love will, too. And in the short time between now and then, YOU HAVE A VERY LIMITED AMOUNT OF FUCKS TO GIVE. Hence, it is important that you make selective choices of the things you devote your time and attention to (or give a fuck about) before then, or you're likely going to get, um? FUCKED.</li></ul>

The first step to not giving a fuck.

#1 New York Times Bestseller Over 1 million copies sold In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

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#1 New York Times BestsellerOver 10 million copies soldIn this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people.For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up.Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek.There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

Mark Manson (born 1984) is a professional blogger, entrepreneur, and former dating coach. Since 2007, he's been helping people with their emotional and relationship problems. He has worked with thousands of people from over 30 different countries. He regularly writes and updates his blog at: www.markmanson.net

The value of suffering.

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